April 2, 2011

How To Make Your Girlfriend Commit

A woman’s ability to commit is greatly dependent on quality over quantity.

Although it is common that women get easily swept off their feet when it comes to romance, there are also many factors that affect their decision to fight or flight in the relationship.

Here are some effective tips on how to make sure that she’s in for the commitment ride.

1. Lend me your ears

According to John Gray’s book entitled, “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus”, women complain that men do not listen to them.

This is indeed a classic example of how women think. Women value feelings and the quality of relationships. They gauge a relationship based on how feelings are being communicated.

If a guy doesn’t listen there’s a big chance that she will resent it and eventually detach herself from the relationship altogether.

So it doesn’t really matter if she comes home upset about her chipped nails, or if she is verbalizing concerns about your ability to put down the toilet seat, no matter how petty it may sound, men should LISTEN.

2. Compliment them especially on their hair

They say that a woman’s hair is her crowning glory, thus, women spend such unimaginable time, effort and money for their hair.

Men have no idea how much time is spent on a ironing a woman’s hair, nor the amount of pain that she goes through in undergoing a hair weave just so that her partner can notice and compliment her looks.

Therefore, you better make sure that when she comes home from the salon, you say something nice.

And if her hair happens to be really bad and looked like Cousin It had a baby with a werewolf, then there are other things to comment on such as her clothes, face and body.

The point is you have to pay attention!

Whilst men use power and money to impress women, women, however, use looks to impress men.

If she doesn’t get the appreciation for how she looks, it makes her feel the same way as a man who isn’t being appreciated for the meals he bought for dinner.

And if that happens, she may try to look for the attention someplace else.

3. Explain your silence

Once in a while men try to pull back and detach themselves from the relationship. Men need this to keep them from being bored and suffocated.

They need a healthy distance from time to time for them to feel excited about the relationship and make them want it even more.

While men find this as normal as a dental prophylaxis, women find this pulling back phenomenon to be mind-blowing and cruel.

Many women interpret a man’s reservation as loss of his desire for them. Thus, she begins to resent him and question stability with him.

If a man lets her keep on thinking this way, she’ll eventually give up and lose interest altogether.

Therefore, a man should make his silence and distance clearly understood, or else she’ll accuse him of other things and eventually this can justify her non-commitment.

4. All Things Big and Small

Men are preoccupied with grandeur.

They want to pursue big things like build large corporations, base-jump from the tallest buildings in town, climb the biggest mountains or shoot the largest animal on their hunting trips. That’s their nature.

On the other hand, women appreciate the small just as the big things that you do for them. You can help change the woman’s light bulb in her room and become the biggest stud-muffin she has ever seen.

Or you can propose to her on a glacier and she can still be mad at you for forgetting to take out the garbage last night. All gestures big and small are equal to a woman’s eyes.

5. Don’t solve, just understand

When it comes to communication between partners, according to John Gray, “Men must listen to women without offering solutions but in order to understand what she is going through.”

This is very true. Women are not as results-oriented as men are. Women are more process-oriented.

This means that in order for your girlfriend to commit, and ultimately stop nagging at you, she needs to know that you understood where she’s coming from.

6. Out of sight, out of mind

According to the book, “Why Men Love Bitches,” by Sherry Argov, there is a quote that says “Whilst a woman falls in love in a man’s presence, a man falls in love in a woman’s absence.”

This means that in order for a woman to commit she needs to see you most of the time.

When she feels that you’re involved and active in many aspects of her life, family, friends, work, hobbies and plans, she will think that there is a good potential for her to invest on your relationship even more.

The effect will be different when you are not paying attention to her needs and are frequently absent in her life.

She will eventually forget about you and move on to looking for other means that can give her the attention she wants.

7. State out your intentions and future plans

A woman needs to know that the relationship is going somewhere before she would even begin to commit to it.

This is why cunning married men con their mistress into believing that one day they are going to leave their wives, promising them that there is a potential for the relationship to work and that all she needs to do is wait until she wakes up one morning and realizes that she’s waited half a lifetime for him.

Unfortunately, these kinds of cunning and guileful men know the exact words women love to hear from their partner.

When it comes to talking about the future and its goals, women get hooked like a kitten dancing around catnip.

While men are more spontaneous and happy-go-lucky, women go “ga-ga” over planning and organizing for the future. It gives them the sense of security that they need.

8. Don’t criticize her weight

Never, ever, under any circumstance, should you criticize a woman’s weight. She will never forgive you for this. And will unconsciously feel less desired as time goes on.

The more she feels undesirable, the more she’ll pull away from your relationship. If you want her to lose weight, invite her to go jogging with you, or plan dates that involve physical activities.

9. Stability Markers

Science reveals that during prehistoric times, female Neanderthals transfer their loyalty from one male to another, depending on who can give the best shelter.

This is because a woman’s brain is predisposed into the search for security and comfort. This is also why when you put a woman to live in a house, she will turn it into a home.

She’ll tirelessly invest her time and energy raising curtains onto bare windows, decorate the bathroom doorknobs with pink, floral towels, dress up your toilet with fluffy seat covers and replace the old T-shirt you use as floor rags with colorful mats from Bed, Bath and Beyond.

A woman who wants to commit will think about the security of her future. She wants to see stability markers in order to help her decide if she wants to get serious with the guy.

Many women greatly consider a man’s source of income, his drive and ambitions in life and his ability to provide for her needs before they make the commitment with him.

Security is also the same logic behind how a woman gets turned on with the brain surgeon who’s riding a nice-looking Lamborgini and parks it inside a multi-million dollar mansion along Beverly Hills, instead of being with the hippie loser she dated in highschool who still lives with mom and has no plans of ever moving out.



Powered by Facebook Comments